No one was willing to start a middle school post so I will.
Remember the days of Square dancing in gym class? That was a real Ho Down.......right? Well hold that thought ladies.
There was another Ho Down of a different kind in the boys gym class during floor hockey. Everyone should remember "Ho Ho Hawrylo the gym teacher. Well Tim Cunningham bet that no one could place a slap shot right at the teacher. So we all agreed, before coming out of the locker room, that Ho Ho was his own goalie but what he didn't know was that he was the goal as well. So during the game no one was really trying to score an actual goal.....we were more interested in taking pop shots at the teacher. He was getting pretty fed up with dodging shots by everyone and knew nothing about the little wager. He surely knew the 5-D's of Dodge Ball (dodge, dip, duck, dive, and dodge) and avoided almost every pop shot thrown his way. He couldn't figure out why that little ball kept coming his way even when he moved to so many different locations on the floor. With about a minute left to play I got onto the floor and tried so hard to line up the perfect shot.............and then it happened........that little hard as a rock ball reached my stick......and there he stood directly in front of me about ten feet away, it was like the sea had separated, and he was looking down at his timer without a clue as to what was coming. I wound up and........blasted the hardest slap shot I could manage.....and time seemed to freeze as the ball was in air. To this day I have no idea where the ball struck him. Suddenly there was a thud......and then another thud. It was Ho Ho Down on the floor. He was like a turtle on his back trying to turn over and get upright again. Timmy C. yelled out "You got him" and everyone was rolling on the floor laughing. Ho Ho yelled out "Gillespie and Cunningham get to the office" Tim and I got sent to Mr. Snyder's office and kicked out of class for a period of time. For those of you who didn't know, Mr. Snyder was my uncle.......so therefor I thought nothing of being sent to the office. After all we were family right???? Wrong!!!!!! That was the worse paddling of my life. I swear he glued tacks to that paddle just for me. This was not the end of it. Word traveled home faster than any email or fax of today. Round two started when I got home that day.
I look back on this event in my life now and realize that I would do it all over again just to see my buddies laughing their asses off on the floor again. This is by far one of the funniest days of my middle school life.
My daughter can't believe that we use to get hit with a paddle in school for doing bad things. I say they should bring them back!!!!!!
Sunday, February 26, 2006
A "Ho Down" at Lincoln
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51 comments:
Great story Randy! I'm picturing Mr. H (I can't remember how to spell his name either!) flat on his back. He wasn't the most coordinated man to begin with! Paddles! Mr. Laubauch had a paddle that had holes drilled in it to cut down on wind resistance, I remember he used to stand at the front of the class and swing it like a baseball bat!
I HATED square dancing!!!
ok vicki...as for paddles...mr. strein...he had paddles that were the same as laubauch....and i ditto....square dancing...yuck!
randy--i love starting the day off with a laugh, how funny...if you have a pic of him, isnt his name right there for the spelling. lets see Hawrylo. being the wife a teacher, and having to listen to stories of the kids today, i agree. bring back the paddles...another problem is, like you said, you probably got it worse when you got home...today, the parents are calling complaining the teacher is wrong because little johnny can do no wrong!!
Kristen - that's the funny thing...I have no idea who posted that picture on the post. I have a feeling it was Matt doing his magic again.....so if it was you Matt....thanks. I agree Kristen...kids have no fear of authority today. Are you sure on the spelling of his name because I can go in and edit that part.
yes, i'm sure on the spelling..i have our 8th grade lms yearbook in front of me!!! cheated!!!
you guys are soooo right...kids today are so disrespectful and couldn't care less about what happens in school because they won't have to answer to anyone at home....
R---Fantastic post! I don't even know where to begin, but if you'll indulge me, here are two things:
First, when I was director of communications for a statewide non-profit that represented local governments, I used to travel the state speaking to county gatherings of local government officials. And one of the things I would always mention was how when I was growing up, if I got in trouble at school, by the time I got home, my mom knew about it, and I got again - and often worse - at home! Most local elected officials are older and they identified with how times had changed. They saw what Kristen and Andrea mentioned - somewhere along the way, parents, teachers, coaches, whatever stopped being on the same team trying to teach kids respect. It definitely shows in their behaviour.
Second, I see this a lot as a basketball official (sorry long-e). My first year as an official in the Lehigh Valley was my fifth year overall. I did varsity boys in Harrisburg and was more than qualified for the games I got - inlcuding a scrimmage at Northern Lehigh against Freedom.
So as the game goes on, it becomes clear that this one Freedom kid is really good - but also really aggressive and a little hot-headed. So at one point on offense, he has the ball stripped away (no foul) and it's loose on the floor, he and a Nolehi player go diving for it and he fouls the Nolehi player in the process. I call the foul and as he gets up, he says "Motherfucker!" - but only really loud enough for me and the nearby players to hear.
I blow my whistle again and say, "Coach, I'm gonna need a sub for #33 here." The Freedom coach loses it on me. Now I had never seen a crowd this big at a scrimmage, but crowd is no yelling at me and at the coach. The coach doesn't know me and I don't know him, but it shouldn't matter.
I calmly and respectfully say, "Coach, calm down. He's getting a little out of control and I'm asking you to sub him out for a bit - he can come back in on the next dead ball." He yells, "you can't do that!" Which is the wrong thing to say and the wrong way to say it. I reply, "Coach, I'm treating you with respect, and I expect the same from you and your players. There is NO reason to try to show me up in front of your fans and players. He used foul language, that's unsportsmanlike conduct, I'm just asking you to give him a blow and let him calm down."
The coach yells, again, "But this is only a scrimmage!" At which point, I say loud enough for everyone to hear, "And you're both lucky, because if it was a game you'd both be on the bus already. Another word from you and I'll send you there now - scrimmage or not."
He fumed and stared and subbed for the kid, but didn't say anything. At the next stoppage in play, he asked me if the kid could come back in and I said sure. Then he said, "you know, I don't want to start something, but he told me he didn't say anything." I looked him sqaure in the eye and I said, "Do you believe him? Do you think I'm just picking on him?" His eyes looked down to the floor and then back to me and he just sat down.
Epilogue: The coaches have too much power in assigning games in the LV. I got a call from the league assignor after that and he told me he was taking back my games because of the incident. I said, without even hearing my side? In the Mid-Penn, our assignor would have laughed at the coach and said, if you behave like that and call to complain again, I'll make sure he does all your games.
Sorry for the long comment.
Randy, funny post. I only vaguely remember hearing about that incident. A good laugh is a good way to start a Monday morning.
Todd, I think it is a sad state that kids and some adults have lost respect for authority. It makes you wonder what things will be like in another 20 years.
I remember having to go around the entire school w/ either Dave Whiteman or Strohly scraping gum off the bottom of desks and hallways because Mr. Freeman always caught us chewing gum. Yes Yes the paddles I recall a day when Wally got like the entire class for something or other, and who was the real tall Math teacher??? He paddled really hard. Lisa Pillar and I also once got in big trouble in 8th grade for yelling curse words at Mrs. Miller. Girls remember in Gym after showers how you would have to yell your number or if excussed the letter "PorM". Oh how we ALL hated that one. Thinking of that today still makes me think Phyllis was a wack-job.
Randy, excellent story. I could see the story as you were telling it.
Mullen - trying to straighten out these kids one at a time....admirable, but challenging. I do believe that's a story about officiating. Thanks for the posting. I asked for it.
mullen....great story...i've seen it too within the schools over the years....especially hard out here with all the bilingual students that think they can get away with more....not to mention all the parents that call back to the schools insisting their children are angels and wouldn't do what was accused.....never taking responsability...
enough of that....with that in mind....maryjo....mrs. miller was a bitch! she hated me and was out to get me from day one....because she HATED cheerleaders. she and my mother went rounds....and words to you all.....I WAS/AM and angel!!! ha!
As a teacher, the most frustrating part of the job for me was dealing with parents. Ofcourse, the school I worked at was less than ideal, but still...they were constantly making excuses for their children's behavior. Amazing though...when you met the parent...you could often see why the child acted as they did. Nope, don't miss it a bit. And my hat goes off to anyone who works with children and parents in any capcity.
jamie....wut part of florida?
MJ - the tall math teacher was Mr. Breon. I think Physical Phyllis was a bit wacky too.
Carol, TMM, Jamie - I teach in a school in a really deprived area, in another country, and the parents here are no different - their kids are angels and can do no wrong. You're right Jamie, when you meet the parent you understand where the child gets it from. I've actually had parents say to me "My kid isn't allowed to do detention." to which I usually answer "then your kid shouldn't have done xxxxx". It's bullshit. It's not that hard to teach a kid good manners. Off my soapbox now. Sorry....
great story Randy, the re-write made it even better and yes it was me that put in the pic. i'm curious, in the blogger interface, when everybody else clicks on "edit posts", do you have access to everybody's posts or just your own?
We see all the posts - but the "edit" option only exists for ours. It's the same way on the uco blog. I don't know if there is a way you can change that or not (for ours - not this one).
After all - you are the '86 Class Bog Moderator - and [in my best Eric Cartman voice] we will respect your authority.
ok, this brings up a couple thoughts of my own...to start, andrea its funny you mention the bilinqual students, brad has plenty, and i guess its their way to just say MR when they want him, they never say his last name, however, its Meester, Meester and he wont answer until they say his name
and another funny story for you (i think so anyway) you mentioned how mrs miller hated cheerleaders, well a few years back chs had a fall pep rally to start off all the fall sports out at the football field, and phyllis gets up to speak, she goes to introduce her team and she says "well, most of my team is out here on the field behind me" (the cheering squad)because now they can do both. i just had a good laugh about that!!
Kristin...my students were almost all hispanic as well and they never called me anything but "Miss" which sounded like "Meese". I'd be walking through the mall and hear "MEESE"...and I'd hide! It's nice to live somewhere else where I'm not easily recognized!
Andrea...I lived in Orlando.
both? i bet that was a jolt....she probably thought she was having a heart attack....i would have loved to been there to see that. remember how she yelled at us all the time?
yes, i remember. we used to cheer while standing on the line in the gym and she'd glare
but MJ i dont remember the PorM reference, could you elaborate?
I'm glad that you all liked the story. I'm dissappointed that Tim C. has not logged in. I can't remember who else was in that gym class with us. Someone out there has to remember this.
Mullen - This behavior already exists at a 3rd and 4th grade level. Some of the parents are worse than the kids. My one nephew played ice hockey for Whitehall....you want to see parent's act like complete assholes and promote it to the playes....go watch a high school ice hockey game sometime. Some of the cheap shots that these kids are taught to deliver to another player could actually end a kids career in all sports. These kids are 15 to 17 years old taking full body checks up against the glass. And the parent's cheer when it happens. What has happened to our society???? Now I have to go re-read my story just to have laugh again.
Mare - I'm glad you could see the entire thing play out as you read it. That was the effect I was going for.
Kristen & Jamie - that's how they address teachers here in England. It's "sir" or "miss" (without the hispanic accent). So my students, if they want my attention, will say "miss" never "Mrs. Collinson". And teachers refer to each other this way. I do 2 school trips a year, and we have to take a token male along (my department is all women) and we always refer to this male teacher as "sir", as in "Go and ask sir if he has your room key." It's bizarre.
Randy---You're 100% right. When coaches and parents act a certain way - either toward each other or officials or opponents, then the kids think it is okay for them to act that way. Whether you discipline them or not will not matter, it's the example you set that has a more lasting impact on them.
I'm not saying we shouldn't stick up for our kids. On the contrary, we should teach them to respect themselves and others.
I have so many basketball stories - some in this vein some not. But they're better in person (Long-e thinks I have a certain lilt - or is it panache?) and too long to type out.
I think I just heard a collective "Thank god!"
Your last name is Collinson?
No, it's Mullen. You know that.
Oh, my bad. Vicki - I think he's talking to you!
Randy-Easy on the Ice Hockey subject. Myself and two other individuals started that hockey league back in 1990. I coached Parkland's team for ten years and saw much worse! One of the parents came to a game packing a pistol in plain sight. Stick to biking !!! haha.. Checking and making the glass rattle is part of the game !!
No Sympathy here
Wait, I'm stuck on Kristen's comment on the cheerleaders can also play field hockey. You mean I could have had a chance to wear a cute cheering outfit if I was born 20 years later. Damn those plaid uniforms! By the way, how does that work?
Yes, it's Collinson. We've decided that we're going to name the baby (a boy) Colin and use my maiden name as his middle name so his name will be...
Colin Collings Collinson :-)
Robb - well lets lace up man.....I need to take some frustrations out. Well that story is nothing....one of my girl soccer player's parent came packing a ball point pen.....he could've taken an eye out with that thing....ha ha ha.
Mare--if i remember correctly, werent your field hockey skirts plaid? anyway there are several girls and boys who double and maybe even triple sport..there has been alot of controversy though around practicing, i guess the cheerleaders just practice in the evening, since you cant very well play field hockey inside....there are too many sports at Catty now for such a small school, they've added soccer ugh! volleyball, talk about golf coming back
Figures they would bring golf back....
Kristen - what's wrong with soccer?
boys soccer----yuck. long story, much controvery!!!
Randy---Don't mess with me and my pen [click-click, click-click].
Did you ever see that jay mohr comedy bit about the pen? Hilarious.
kristen....their skirts were short also weren't they? what is she complaining about....you didn't miss out on anything! i don't know your story, but i agree on the soccer thing....none of my children were allowed to play....
Mullen - we got the same kind of goofy humor. My wife says she has two kids and is the mother of none????? I had enough of this adult life crap....lets go back to being kids......anyone see Hawrylo lately????
R--I got your back brother...
randy/i see ed all the time, he lives on circle drive, about 50 steps from my front door
you should give Ed the link to the blog.
I'm sure he'd love to read about how Randy's slapshot floored him like a turtle! Kristen, he lived in that house when we were still in school. He's been there FOREVER!! Circle drive? You live around the corner from my mom...
yes, i've seen her a few times//also mr fickes and mr williams still live on circle drive, lets see, and laubach and mr miller...
also, my family still owns the little white house on the corner of pa ave and erie st/my cousin owns it now and my aunt and uncle are building a small house in the back yard for themselves
Do you think if I showed up at his front door with a hockey stick and puck.....he would run for cover?????
My parent's neighbors! Kristen, I haven't seen you over there for a while.
randy--try it, but call me first so i can watch
longe--yes across the street from the old ranch thats for sale, your parents neighbors, i'm over more in the summer since i walk more with trisha, and how would you see me anyway if you dont live there anymore? Hey, how are Robin and Wendy doing? havent seen them in ages! tell them is said Hi
They are both doing well. They are now neighbors outside of Bath on the Whitetail golf course. Robin has 2 daughters, and Wendy has a son....
Matt, maybe we need to give Mr. Stitts the blog info so he can read about how you threw a corn cob thru the window of his front door. (assuming he is still alive, and if not, rest in peace)
He died years ago.
Vicki,
Hope the UK is treating you well.
Only because my wife's name is "out there" can I say this - but you may want to seriously rethink that name...someone may think he has a stuttering problem if he ever has to give his complete name!
Randy - I never heard that complete story before, but that was frickin' hilarious!! I think that explains why he always walked with a limp...here I thought he had a foot injury, little did I know he was still recovering from a direct hit!
Jeff
Well Jeff, our friends think we should give this kid a really American sounding name like Chip or Zack. We could call him Randy! He'd be popular with the ladies...
Jeff - great to hear from you. I also took a direct hit from Mr. Snyder's paddle that day.....I think I'm still recovering from that one.
Vic - I love name idea.....that kid will go far in life!!!!!!
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